The Smithsonian had offered me a research position and my mother drove me there from Texas for the interview to learn where I would be working and what the job entailed. As a claustrophobic, I couldn’t see myself working in this tiny office at the top of what felt like a tower in King Arthur’s castle. I thanked them for the offer, and we went to New Jersey where my stepfather’s sister lived. It was there that mother found me in a closet, weeping and screaming, “Daddy!” as if I were still a little girl. I was twenty-two years old.
When I took an unpaid leave of absence from being a professor at a small college in Colorado to live with one of my former college students in California, she had quit smoking; I had not. Her rule was: no smoking in the house or the garage. No problem. I took my cup of coffee and cigarettes to my car in the carport and chatted with my Daddy. I was forty-three.
It wasn’t until I had a session with a healer in Pagosa Springs that I realized one of the main reasons we need to let go. She did not ask why I was there; she would not let me say anything. In moments, she said, “Your attachment to your father is keeping him from moving on.” Holy Moses! I was seventy-two at that time and knew I had let him go many years before then. But she was right in sensing that I was “holding on”, but it was to someone else, not my father.
“The Full Moon promises that, if you can courageously let go of a regret, a more optimistic future awaits. This weekend’s Full ‘Snow’ Moon brings with it an abundance of energy which, if used correctly, can transform your life.”
I believe what he says could be true for me. And I will continue doing Ho’oponopono to forgive myself for all my mistakes and regrets so that “letting go” becomes easier:
“I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”
As Molly Beauchemin explains, “With regular practice, reciting these four simple phrases helps develop self-love and self-esteem at the times when we need it most. In this way, it’s both a lullaby to the self and a guaranteed insightful way to approach forgiving other people.”*
Are you holding onto something in the past that keeps you from being in The Present Moment?
Till next time, “Please be kind to everyone you meet, for we all have our hidden sorrows.” ~Tzaddi